Sunday, December 4, 2011

I know You.

I've been a little unsettled for a while. So much of what I'd been told and taught was a lie, a manipulation, a twisted deception. And it's not ok. I didn't know what to believe. I know I believe in You, but beyond that, I felt muddled and confused. 

A close friend spoke some clarity into that fog: "You know who He is. You know what He's told you about Himself. You know that those other people were wrong. You know that. Trust that." 

I started to list what I know about You.

I know You are God.
I know You created all things.
I know You are good, and full of goodness.
I know You love me.
I know You care for me.
I know You are my Provider.
I know You think I'm worth dying for, and that You died so I could live and know You.
I know You are Light.
I know You are Truth.
I know You are Hope.
I know You are Love.
I know You're all I need.
I know You are measureless.
I know You are jealous for me.
I know You want my whole heart.
I know You will never, ever give up on me.
I know You hold me close.
I know You are my Healer.
I know You've set me free.
I know I can trust You.
I know You're more than enough.
I know You saved me.
I know nothing is impossible for You.
I know You are full of grace.
I know You won't judge me.
I know You don't see my sin anymore.
I know You will always find me.
I know You are always there, even when I don't feel like it.
I know You.
I know You aren't angry with me.
I know I don't have to do anything to please You. I know I can't.
I know You see me through.
I know You see me at my worst, and still love me with an unimaginable, untamable love.
I know I don't have to pretend with You. I can tell You anything and everything.
I know You take my broken pieces and turn them into something whole and beautiful.
I know You never fail.

I know that You are light, and in You can be NO darkness.

I know the church told me a lie...taught me darkness, instead of light. I know they told me that rules, legalism, judgement, traditions, and empty words were the only way to please You. And I know I was deceived by that lie. I know I'm a hypocrite, still saturated in that worthless deception. But me and His grace, we're fighting it. I know I don't believe those lies anymore. I can't. But it's tough. Church after church, "christian" after "christian" judged and hurt me, told me lies. Somedays the thought of stepping foot in a church literally terrifies me.

But I know You.

I know You are LIGHT, and in You is no darkness. None.

I trust You.

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